Make changes for your Future Self
Are you familiar with the idea of your future self? More to the point, are your familiar with the idea of making changes now for your future self?
I am sharing a podcast I listened to today by Dr. Benjamin Hardy. Dr. Hardy shared lots of great information that I believe will resonate with my clients and help them think about the changes they can make for their future selves.
Trauma impacts us all. A divorce, a loss of a relationship, or a health set back. The beauty of the trauma experience is that it can be a catalyst for tremendous growth.
How can you take that trauma and make changes that will benefit your future self? I gleaned this from Dr. Benjamin Hardy:
“Emotional development means you’re willing to deal with your emotions, you’re willing to face them, you’re willing to handle them, and you become what’s called psychologically flexible.”
Just knowing that you have a choice can make all the difference. Do you want to space out and avoid your emotions? Do you want to deal with your emotions and grow stronger? The way you handle your emotions now will determine what your future self has to work with.
“If you have specific goals to improve yourself in certain ways, and you’re actually regularly measuring and reporting those goals to other people, you can make huge changes.”
Once you know what you want, you can make changes to get what you want. Where do you want to be in five years? Ten years? Who do you want your future self to be? Once you have an idea of what you want, you can make a plan, read a book, take a class, start a new habit, get an accountability partner.
“You’re not the same person you were in the past. If the current version of you was put in former situations, you would probably do things differently.”
Forgive yourself for your past decisions. You are no longer that person and you can make different choices now.
“Uncertainty is essential because if you’re pursing big goals or if you’re pursuing a big future, obviously there is uncertainty because you’ve never actually done it.”
“Uncertainty is essential.” To me, this kinda sucks
is comforting. I am finding comfort in knowing that this feeling of uncertainty is not a stop sign. It is actually a sign that I am on the right path to bigger and better things.
“It’s important to realize that the story you tell about yourself is the way that you see yourself.”
Dr. Hardy says that we can reframe our past experiences and give new meaning to them. We can inject a sense of safety into old scary experiences. We can tell our story in a different way so that we focus on where we want to be, instead of staying stuck in where we have been. Dr. Hardy gives some good tips around the 21 minute mark of the podcast on this subject. For further work on this, a therapist or life coach can be a valuable resource.
Check out the podcast here and let me know what you think. What was your main takeaway from this podcast? Are you planning any changes now to benefit your future self?
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